Snarkling Clean

Snarkling Clean- because you don't have to cuss to make fun of stuff. Two dedicated readers discuss romance novels- from what made us weep with joy to what made us want to poke pencils through our eyeballs.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Danger! Danger! Danger!

These covers are dangerous! Full of horrifying scary danger! Hugely frightening danger! Because for author Anne Stuart, DANGER is her middle name, people!

At the Edge of the Sun

Robyn: Spy School Study Courses
Distressed Damsels 101- How to Rescue the Girl AND Get A Look Up Her Dress

Missie: Apparently, the edge of the sun is surrounded by water.
And also, why are both his hands on the right side of her waist? Someone doesn't care if someone else lands in the wah-terrrrr!

Darkness Before the Dawn

Robyn: I've never seen that flag before. Just what embassy is this? Whatever country it is, I'm guessing it's fine to wear black pumps with a white suit.

Missie: You would think if she's all, "Danger is my middle name", she would also be all, "Hey, maybe I should wear pants and flat-soled shoes." For the running, and the escaping and the dropping down off balconies and all that. I am just sayin.

Escape Out of Darkness

Robyn: I just want to know one thing. How did Miami Vice's Sonny Crockett get South Beach confused with Switzerland? OnStar, man, OnStar!

Missie: Her: I don't care what you say, PINK IS NOT THE NEW BLACK!
Him: If you don't get down from there right now, little missy, I am so going to slap you! I am seeeer-eeee-ous! Don't even go there! Great, now my manicure is ruined! Thanks! Thank you so much!


Anonymous nessili said...

This chick also seems to have problems getting stuck up on ledges/balconies. Suicidal perhaps?

And on the first two covers it looks like the same dude is "helping" her. If she has a sidekick whose only function is to help her out of windows, perhaps he ought to look for a new job.

BTW, that pink jacket almost looks like a pajama top. Would go well with her blue bathrobe there.

9:42 PM  
Anonymous nessili said...

Another thought about that third cover:

If that rope is how they're supposed to be getting down, why is he not falling off into space?

9:45 PM  
Blogger Robyn said...

Since Missie's comment, I'm taking a second look at number one. His right hand is intersecting his left; she's holding his left wrist even though it's obviously clutching her waist. Wait...he was the subject of some horrible experiment where they switched his hands and then joined them at the wrists and she loves him anyway and is helping him escape, right?

6:35 AM  
Blogger Missie said...

You are giving them too much credit by assuming that some medical experiment gone awry is the reason why the cover is so bad. No. It is just bad. Icky bad. Blech. The End.

Yes, he should definitely look for other employment.

10:03 AM  
Anonymous Michelle said...

So is this a series where the heroine is the same in each book? Hence the model with big hair? Hooo boy.

6:00 PM  
Blogger Bernita said...

Where's her frigging handbag/shoulder bag?

Can't tell me she'd dash out without her ID.

8:08 AM  
Anonymous JEnny said...

Those guys are boob-level in every shot.

I'm sure that wasn't on purpose or anything.

PS. Crockett - Hee!

6:00 AM  

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