Snarkling Clean

Snarkling Clean- because you don't have to cuss to make fun of stuff. Two dedicated readers discuss romance novels- from what made us weep with joy to what made us want to poke pencils through our eyeballs.

Friday, June 08, 2007

Half-Breeds Gone Wild!

If there's one thing we can thank the romance publishing industry for, it's that they give Native Americans the same sensitive, dignified treatment they give the rest of us.

Silken Savage

Robyn: That guy either doesn't see too well in the dark or he's really desperate. But what is up with that jaguar in the tree? We don't have those in North America, do we?

Missie: Nice "Endora from the original Bewitched" eye makeup she's got going on there. I looove it when covers accurately reflect the time period of the story.
Comanche Sunset

Robyn: Wow. I didn't know the sun was still huge and orange but the rest of the sky was black at sunset in the desert. I clutched my chest that way once. I had heartburn.
Missie: It doesn't look as much like the Texas Plains as it does the seventh circle of hell.

Savage Conquest

Robyn: Ummm...where's her right leg?

Missie: Let me get this straight...She's not ON the horse, but dangling off the side somehow while he holds on to her with one arm at the same time the horse is rearing? Somebody explain the physics of that one to me.

Sioux Slave

Missie: No. Blech. No.
Robyn: Honey, come on. How many more times do we have to play 'Pocahontas saves John Smith?'
Up next: Lusty Mormon Appreciation Society!


Blogger StarvingWriteNow said...

OOH!! More fun covers!! (cracking her knuckles) Let's see...

Silken Savage: They plucked their brows and wore fake lashes in the Old West?

Comanche Sunset: Fabio's nipple is HUGE!

Savage Conquest: I don't know about physics, but the mathematics of this is really quite simple. S+H x IG/RH(FM+FH/OD'S)=RNC. {Savage + Heroine x Impossible Grip / Rearing Horse (Flowing Mane + Flowing Hair / Opposite Directions) = Romance Novel Cover}

Sioux Slave: That countryside looks awfully lush and verdant for the northern great plains...

I swear, these are my favorite posts in all of blogland!

5:59 AM  
Blogger Bernita said...

What's with these humongous, steroid flowers that appear on two of them?

8:10 AM  
Anonymous Michelle Willingham said...

Don't you just love those big blue spanky pants on Sioux Slave? And why is HE tied up? Just weird, IMO.

6:22 PM  
Anonymous Jenny said...

I totally had the Sioux Slave fringey top when I was in 7th grade.

Ah the 80's.

6:08 AM  
Blogger Robyn said...

Beth, your romance cover math is freaking brilliant.

Bernita, we can only conclude that passion is a darn good fertilizer.

Spanky pants. I want some.

Jenny, quit reminding me how young you are. Missie does it enough.

9:31 AM  
Anonymous Becki said...

What? Endora was thousands of years old, wasn't she? She could totally have bewitched a handsome young brave a couple of hundred years ago.

7:33 PM  
Blogger Buffy said...

I really really need to read a good romance book soon.

Haven't touched them in years and I don't even know why.

They made me love reading. And history. And adventure. They made me want to travel.

I think I'm gonna pick one up this weekend.

Any suggestions on 'good'?

6:37 AM  
Blogger Robyn said...

Almost too much to mention, buffy. If you like historicals, try Amanda Quick, Julie Garwood or Laura Kinsale. Go over to December (no space) if you like it hot. For contemporaries, the Chesapeake series by Nora Roberts is great. Heck, just about anything by Nora is good.

If you like ones with a paranormal twist, I read Sherrilyn Kenyon. And Lynn Kurland's time travels are perennial faves.

4:42 PM  

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