Snarkling Clean

Snarkling Clean- because you don't have to cuss to make fun of stuff. Two dedicated readers discuss romance novels- from what made us weep with joy to what made us want to poke pencils through our eyeballs.

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Swallow Before You Read This

Hey you.

Someone just emailed me this list and I've got to share it with you. I laughed so hard I think I hocked up a kidney. Oh, and a reminder- from now until Dec. 15th, give us your Romance Novel Title and one-to-two sentence blurb on the comments section of any post. If you'd rather, email me at robwriter6@sbcglobal.net with your entries. The winner gets an autographed copy of Mary Griffith's Made of Honor.

Relationship Advice From The Experts

HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?

( 1 ) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. -- Alan, age 10
( 2 ) No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with. -- Kirsten, age 10

WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

( 1 ) Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then. -- Camille, age 10
( 2 ) No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married. -- Freddie, age 6 (very wise for his age)

HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

( 1 ) You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. -- Derrick, age 8

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

( 1 ) Both don't want any more kids. -- Lori, age 8

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

( 1 ) Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough. -- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)
( 2 ) On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date. -- Martin, age 10

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

( 1 ) I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns. -- Craig, age 9

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

( 1 ) When they're rich. -- Pam, age 7
( 2 ) The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that. -- Curt, age 7
( 3 ) The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. -- Howard, age 8 (4) It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them. -- Anita, age 9 (bless you child)

HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

( 1 ) There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? -- Kelvin,age 8

And the #1 Favorite is.....
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
( 1 ) Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck. -- Ricky, age 10

Ladies, I am filled with hope for the next generation!!

11 Comments:

Anonymous Michelle said...

I like that last one!

::honk, honk::

6:26 PM  
Blogger Robyn said...

My favorite is 7 year old Pam: When is it okay to kiss someone? When they're rich! That girl's got her priorities straight!

7:31 PM  
Blogger Jolene*Marie said...

ROTFL! That was funny. I love kids haha. Never know what their gonna say.

Trynity the little girl I babysit used to tell me she kissed a boy. So I got smart and started telling her boys are bad news, unless their just friends. So she started saying it. Well..yesterday we were watching Cinderella..and wouldn't you know they kiss? And guess what Little Miss says then? "Jolene, didn't anyone tell Cinderella that boys are bad news?"

Me: :-S

3:49 AM  
Blogger Missie said...

I love it! Yes, boys are bad news. Especially cute ones with big blue eyes who promise to one day build you a log home in the woods...before you know it, you end up with a tract home next door to Cujo, two kids, and a butt as big as Cleveland.

But he is still cute.

7:46 AM  
Anonymous Megan said...

I love the comment about playing dead if the date turns sour! Actually, I can see where that's not a bad idea.

Cheers,
Megan

7:58 AM  
Blogger OzzatLarge said...

I agree with the playing dead part. My favorite saying in the world is: "Quando Omni Flunkus Moritati." Translated from greek means "If all else fails, play dead."


-T

10:09 AM  
Blogger Jolene*Marie said...

haha yea that one struck me as funny as well as his "The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns." that made me grin. heh.

~Jo

12:33 PM  
Blogger Missie said...

Terry,
I can tell you watch the Red Green Show too. We love the Man's Prayer at the end of every episode:

"I'm a man, but I can change.
If I have to...I guess."

2:08 PM  
Blogger OzzatLarge said...

Yes, Red Green, the manshow. Duct tape, homemade gadgets and junk ohhhh yeah. Have quoted the mans prayer many a time. But playing dead is a vital part of life.


-T

10:01 AM  
Blogger Jolene*Marie said...

Rotfl, I love the Red Green Show. Ducttape, enough said. ~Jo

12:53 PM  
Anonymous Amy said...

Love this!! :)

7:09 PM  

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